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Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Celebrity TV host hospitalized after an accident with a cucumber

gay and cucumber
You don't want to sit on that cucumber!

"Sucaldito, one of the hosts of ABS-CBN's "The Buzz," reportedly met with the accident Sunday night and was rushed to the hospital after complaining of "extreme pain" in his bottom.X-rays subsequently revealed that a broken piece of cucumber, about five inches in length, had gotten lodged into the lower end of his large intestine. It was not immediately clear how the cucumber got there."

Yes, it is really not clear in my mind and heart and soul how this smart cucumber got in there. HOW???

"The surgeons who operated on Sucaldito were tight-lipped and refused to discuss his case with media, citing doctor-patient confidentiality. Oddly enough, they all looked like they were trying vainly to keep from laughing and refused to look reporters in the eye.

Members of Sucaldito's household who declined to be named said they recovered the other half of the cucumber, also five inches in length, in Sucaldito's bedroom.

They said it had "bite marks" and was in a "soggy" state.

Besides the cucumber, they said they also found "a bottle of Johnson's baby oil, pictures of scantily clad men, and lots of tissue paper."

Reached by phone, Sucaldito said he is fine and will be discharged from hospital soon. He explained that it was all an accident."

So it was all an accident and this is how it happened! - Oh my, you don't want to mess with that cucumber.

"Gumagawa kasi ako ng salad. Napaupo ako dun sa chair e meron palang pipino dun na patayo ang pusisyon. Basta, mabilis kasi ang mga pangyayari (I was making a salad. I sat on a chair but there was a cucumber there in an upright position. Everything just happened so fast)" he said.

I never thought that a cucumber can be this dangerous. When it stands straight, firm and sturdy like a soldier, it can pierce through your clothing, and into your body and into your very soul. hehehe, peace!

In a related development, a group of vegan Filipinos is reportedly thinking of filing an abuse complaint against Sucaldito for allegedly molesting a harmless and defenseless vegetable."

Where did this news came from? It's from an entertainment blog, Good Times Manila, that features satires on celebrities and politicians. The site disclaimer says:

Quote ---Is this blog screwing with me?

The short answer is YES.

This is satire, you guys. Which means you're not supposed to believe anything you read here. So please refrain from asking: "Is this true?"


This one made my day and wanted to share it with everyone.

Every time I see cucumbers, I just can't help but smile. :)

2 comments:

Speaking of weird, look at this freaky poem:

http://voices.yahoo.com/three-dolls-sit-unfashionable-display-12147001.html?cat=2

Oh I really hate dolls. Lol. But thanks for sharing :)

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